Life Will Lose the Romance

I have three kids. They are 17, 16, and 9.

No one ever told me that when you have three kids and there are careers and bills and sports and piano and school lunches to pack and supper to make every night... that life will lose it's romance. Not just the romantic initial swept off your feet feeling that you have at the beginning of your relationship. But your internal romance. The romantic notion that your life will be touched by magic. The romantic thought that life will be easy. The romance of having everything taken care of and living a life with no problems.

As I grow older, I have started to embrace the idea that maybe the magic is in the struggle. That with each difficult challenge, with each hurdle I slam through never quite seeming to sail right over it with grace, that I myself gain a little bit more magic. Sometimes I see it in the way that my husband and kids think that I can do anything, or they assume that they can ask for anything and I can accomplish it easily.

Sometimes, I really wish I had a mom. I wish I had a mom who would help me with the juggle. I wish I had a mom who knew what my kids liked and would plan small surprises for them. I wish I had a mom who knew what I like and would plan small surprises for me. I wish I had a mom who cared as deeply about me as I care about my kids.